Saturday, August 30, 2008

He's Got My Back

If the title of this post is conjuring up images in your head of Greg rescuing me from a crowd of dangerous men in whose vicinity I was practicing my new found eyelash fluttering skills which were only meant to be seen by Greg, across the table of our white clothed, candlelit table in the expensive Viennese restaurant in which we were dining, when they approached our table to flirt back in their own crude way, then please, close you're eyes and imagine away (and add in all sorts of heroic acts and clever retorts by my dearly beloved, 'cause he really is chivalrous like that) and join us back here at this post when you're ready for a change of subject, as that never actually happened and is not what this post is about.
please insert three to four periods in the proceeding paragraph if you don't approve of my marathon run-on sentence.
While I'm sure that would make for a much more engrossing post, it is not the tale I have to tell. MY tale is about the second most captivating thing I could write about: health issues! Now that I've got your attention, let's begin.

Just after Greg and I were married, I was feeling so independent and grown up, running my own household, having someone to "take care of," finding a job to help get my husband through the rest of school etc. While the rest of me was busy with all these adult, responsible activities, my skin was still acting like that of a teenager. I found this to be rude and irritating. I think it should have put forth more of an effort to act mature instead of undermining my adulthood. I had always wanted to go on Accutane and come out with beautiful, amazing skin, but I hadn't had the opportunity. It seemed to me like it was now or never, since you can't be on Accutane if there's any possibility that you may become pregnant. So I saw a dermatologist who agreed that I could begin the six month round (or was it three? It felt like six.) of taking the medication.

Accutane almost immediately cleared up my skin. It also made it so I didn't need to wash my hair every day, for the first time in my life (or at least since I was twelve, before which time my hair was only washed during my weekly bath/shower when my sister and I would shower together and pretend we were under a waterfall and the floral shower curtain was the wildflower covered mountain). But that wasn't all it did for me. It also ruined my back. I started having back pain early on while taking the medication and it continued to get worse and worse. I found I was unable to keep up with all my responsibilities as a mother's helper, but the family I worked for were super nice and relieved me of the dish washing which was my main back breaker, and didn't mind me laying around in between bouts of playing with/feeding the twins. I assumed my back would feel better once I finished my medication. It sort of did.

But mostly it didn't. Since then I have had recurring spells of back pain. Weeks where I could not do some of the very basics of housekeeping. Anything that required you to work with something in front of you i.e. dish washing, laundry hanging and vacuuming. I could only choose one of those things to do each day. It should have been an awesome excuse not to clean, but it was really just a pain, in every sense of the word. In short I'm slightly crippled. Unfortunately I'm afraid I probably will be forever. Oh, I have gone for months without any problems at all, but I have also had entire months where I couldn't sleep past 4 am because the pain was so bad. (aren't you enjoying this Tour of Lisa's Health Issues? FUN!)

Now for the part where Greg's got my back. Our backyard when we moved in was a wasteland of thick weeds. Greg spent days out pulling those weeds. When it was about half finished we decided to hire a neighborhood kid to finish it for us, because Greg's back wasn't handling it all that well. Fast forward a month to where he starts to mention once in a while that his back really hurts (he never mentions if anything hurts). A week later he's walking like an old man in the morning. Another week and he's walking like an old man all the time. Do you think I cried the next week when I saw him coming up the front stairs with a cane in his hand? Maybe a little.

When he started having problems walking in a position that didn't make him look like a caveman, he went to the doctor. He had some x-rays and even confessed to me that he was worried it might be something serious. Fortunately it doesn't look like anything serious. It's just that now he can't sit down or stand up in under 3 minutes and to get into laying position might take 5, with LOTS of pain, and I can't watch him attempt it because a) he doesn't want me to (duh) and b) it doesn't make me feel all happy and sunshiny. He has been waking up 2 or 3 times a night to get up (5 minute process) and walk around to get his back into sleepable position again.

We've figured out that he has sciatica (it goes all the way down his leg at this point). Apparently it's very likely that it will go away within a few months. He's trying to get lots of exercise, has some funky laser and magnetic therapy, and gets plenty of rest as well (although I still have to force him to let me do things sometimes). The other day I was carrying the groceries upstairs from the car and he was very apologetic that I had to do all the manly duties, besides my regular wifely duties. I told him I didn't mind, and he said, "I now pronounce you man and wife."

I meant to post this on Thursday, but posted about the award instead, and I'm so glad I did, because Greg's back is definitely improving! He hardly uses the cane at all! The last 2 nights he's only been waking up once a night for his little walk. I'm so glad to see that he is feeling so much better! I hope to have a real man as man of the house someday soon!

Now that he's not walking like a Neanderthal anymore, I'm hoping I can get him to stop dragging me around by my hair*.
*He has never actually dragged me around by my hair. I just have a hard time ending my posts sometimes and this time it just seemed right to end it with a lamer-than-usual joke.

13 comments:

McEwens said...

OMG!!! YOU ARE SO FUNNY!!!! I hope his back is better (GREAT cleaver lead in line!) I love the manly duties tie into you are now man AND wife!!! FUNNY!

Erin said...

I'm so sorry to hear that both of you have back problems. I think that should mean that the kids unload the groceries. Is that a normal side effect of Accutane? It seems so bizarre. I am glad Greg is doing a little better. I think you need a Tempur-pedic mattress. Many members of my family have back issues and it definitely helps them.

Susan said...

Whoa, for a second there I thought I was reading a Stephenie Meyers novel! Then I thought I was going blind. Then I realized that you were trying to be all sneaky with your super long post by keeping it in that tiny font as if we'd all be fooled into thinking it wasn't a long, long post about back problems! How DO you make a long long post about back problems so interesting?

I agree about the tempur-pedic bed. We have Costco's knock-off and I literally have not had a hip or shoulder ache (used to be constant at night, and sometimes extend through the day) ever since we got it (it only has a few inches of the memory foam, the rest is regular foam, but it still does the job.)

As for Accutane, I remember the long long list of possible side effects, luckily I don't think I had any of them, I wonder if it makes a difference how old you are when you take it, but it's probably just random. Lucky you :(

Alison Wonderland said...

Yeah really small font. What's up with that?

Anyway, I'm glad he's feeling better.

-oLiViA said...

I just read that whole post and all the comments. I really must be bored. they we're about back problems. (Try saying that in public without your sanity being questioned.) I loved that shout out to our family! I was all, AH! She loves us!!! And stuff. I agree with most of the comments, get temper pedic. They're actually QUITE expensive, (amazing, a twelve year old looked in to it.) But knock offs are just as statisfying.

And & da boyz said...

Oh your poor backs! Too bad you don't live with a massage therapist anymore! Here's a little tip that you probably already know: a good way to help relieve sciatic pain is to sit on a tennis/raquet/squash ball and roll it around. Oftentimes the piriformis muscle (located right in the middle of the butt) gets too tight around the sciatic nerve--so working it out with a ball is good, and also stretching your hip and glutes out several times a day can help ease the pressure. Posture can be a huge indicator for this kind of pain, so make sure he has a good desk situation at work. Good luck!

Heather of the EO said...

Back problems stink. But you sure can make them funny, lady! Great post.

Emiline said...

I'm sorry for all of your back pain!

That's crazy that accuctane would make your back hurt. Did they warn you of that? It doesn't seem quite fair.
I've had problems with my complexion since I was about 16...and I'm 23 now. I keep thinking, Anyday this will stop! So far it hasn't. I don't really want to visit a dermatololigist. Have you ever tried tea tree oil?

Moody said...

LOL I liked your joke! I'm glad to hear his back is improving. Goodness I'm so sorry to hear about yours. You need to have at least one good back between the two of you though, so I hope he's back in shape soon. At one point I was considering Accutane too, but am glad I never did now. That really stinks!

Kazzy said...

Sciatica is the worst. I only get it now and then and it is usually tied to a monthly thing (cough cough). Sorry about your pains. I am glad he is on the mend.

GrumpyAngel said...

I'm sorry that you guys have back problems. It kind of sounds awful. What's not awful is this: I love your sense of humor. I love that you can turn a painful thing into a funny and captivating post! :-)

I hope the back problems get better.

Accutane Side Effects said...

My name is Aatiyah Paulding and i would like to show you my personal experience with Accutane.

I have taken for 1 months.I am 27 years old.This is my second go round of Accutane. I started my first treatment about 7 years ago.My acne definitely started to come back last year, and I was prescribed topical creams and antibiotics. Of course, they did not work. I just started Accutane again 24 days ago. I can already see the difference! I wish that I was prescribed this 10 months ago after wasting money on useless dermatology prescriptions. I was already prepared for the tedious prework prior to taking the drug. The monthly doctor visits, blood tests, and process of getting prescriptions are a pain! females : Please take this drug seriously. Discuss all effects with your partner.My symptoms include DRY LIPS, PEELING SKIN, and minor muscle aches occasionally. My advice is to carry carmex, blistex, or medicated vaseline in your purse or pocket.(Trust me : The lipstick will not stay on). Lubriderm lotion is helping me out a lot! prevents lots of drying. I am very concerned about how long this drug remains in the bloodstream.

Side Effects :
Dry, chapped lips, skin peeling, dry skin, minor muscle aches.

I hope this information will be useful to others,
Aatiyah Paulding

Accutane Side Effects

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