Answered

I woke up at 4:30 to give Spencer his once-nightly feeding (very nice baby). As I had suspected it would, this feeding perfectly coincided with when Greg had to wake up to get ready for his 4 hour drive to Warsaw for a church correlation meeting.

As I sat in bed nursing the baby, listening to the water run as Greg showered in the bathroom next door I started thinking my usual thoughts when he has a lot of driving to do on not enough sleep: "I hope he'll stay awake okay. I hope he'll pull over for a nap if he gets tired." etc. etc.

From there I started thinking about what if something happened to him. Just technical, unemotional things like how would the police know to contact us. What is the protocol. I began to feel that this was a kind of dangerous trip. Greg does tons of driving and is very responsible about being smart and not driving when he's tired, but I felt rather worried.

I decided to stop myself from worrying and pray. I prayed earnestly, certainly more sincerely than I ever have about safety during travel. I reflected on how I need to always be doing my best to be worthy of important blessings I may need to ask for, in order to have the confidence and faith to have my prayers answered.

Greg came into the darkened room, kissed me and the baby good-bye and headed off.

Four hours later he called. He had arrived at the chapel safe and sound. Prayer answered. Then he explained exactly how that prayer (which he wasn't aware I had offered) had been answered.

At one point during the drive Greg's mind wandered, causing him to miss his turn off. Fortunately he noticed it right away and got back on track, losing only a minute or two. Later on in the trip his own premonition from reflections he'd had earlier in the drive lead him to recognize the men on the side of the road waving through the thick fog for what it was: a warning to slow down because of an accident ahead. The road was extremely slippery and visibility was very poor but he was able to stop within inches (or possibly inch) of the car in front of him, which had stopped right behind an overturned car in the road. That accident had happened approximately one or two minutes before he got there.

Heavenly Father loves me, and I love him, too.

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This postpartum period has been the best one for me, ever. It has also been the worst. I have had the most support from Greg this time, taking shifts every night for the first 6 weeks (I wouldn't allow him to with the first three kids since he had to go to work and all) meaning more sleep than ever and he's given some good help around the house, too.

On the other hand, I have visited the hospital no less than three times (I think I know all the doctors there now) and visited my OB/GYN once, and still haven't been for my regular 6 week check-up (though I'm two weeks late). I've only thought "it was something serious" about 14 times, but I never died even once.

Spencer took a few hours to get the hang of nursing but has done very well since then, unlike most of the others. However, I have had other nursing related problems which are what have had me in the hospital (nothing serious, just urgent-ish after hour visits to the doctor, with plenty of physical pain and emotional stress for me).

Despite the (sometimes serious) stress and worry I've had off and on, the depression I feared would envelope me after the birth has never made an appearance. I am so grateful.

I have spent the weeks since the birth doing as little as possible. Feeding people has been my main activity and cooking and baking and nursing (when I'm not crying in pain) are things I love/don't mind doing. Besides that I have only been keeping the house tolerably clean with Greg and the kid's help, and having good food and a clean-ish house has made me very happy. Oh, that and having a SUPER sweet newborn around.

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So I wanted to share two recipes that I absolutely love and have made waaaay too many times in the last two months since just before the baby came. This first is a pasta dish that is so easy to make it's unbelievable. My family cannot get enough of it and I have made it once a week since I got it in a recipe exchange (these weeks super fast and easy AND delicious is EXACTLY what I need). It might not be your cup of tea but I would feel terrible if I didn't share it just in case you love it as much as we do and you never had it to resort to for those last minute meals we all sometimes have to throw together. It's made of foods that I personally have on hand at all times (pretty much). I've changed it from the original recipe but here's how I make it:

Thai Peanut Noodles

1/4 cup peanut butter (crunchy or not)

1/3 cup soy sauce

3 tablespoons water (I take it from the water the chicken boiled in)

1/3 cup firmly packed brown sugar

1/4 cup sesame oil

2 garlic cloves pressed (or minced)

1 teaspoon ginger powder

1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes (I leave this out since I can't handle heat)

1 lb chicken (I only use one small breast since we eat very small amounts of meat around here)

3/4 lb. spaghetti noodles

Bring water to boil and boil chicken (I first cut into even sized pieces, otherwise my chicken is tough on the thinner parts). Remove to cool and cook noodles in the water. In a separate small pan whisk soy sauce and peanut butter together. Stir in remaining ingredients until smooth. Shred chicken and add to sauce. Keep on low to warm sauce while noodles cook. Drain noodles and toss with sauce.

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Then there's this dessert which is lower fat so I think I've convinced myself it's good for you. Also, there's no eggs so it's great for snacking on the dough. I tweaked this one, too by melting in chocolate, which you don't have to do. The original recipe only uses cocoa, just add a couple extra tablespoons if you omit the dark chocolate for melting.

Cocoa Fudge Cookies

1/4 c butter
5 T cocoa
25-50g dark chocolate (maybe 1/4 c chips?)
1 c sugar
1/3 c plain yogurt
1 t vanilla
1 c flour
1/4 t baking soda
1/8 t salt
milk or semi-sweet chocolate chips (1 cup? less?)

Melt butter and cocoa. Stir in dark chocolate to melt. Stir in sugar then add plain yogurt and vanilla and stir. Mix in dry ingredients and chocolate chips. Bake in the usual way (350 for 8-10 minutes)

These cookies are much better quite undercooked (as are all chocolate cookies, IMO) and pretty much not worth eating, or at least not worth the calories, if cooked through (as are all chocolate cookies IMO).

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Maybe you don't care about recipes, but maybe you're like me and you try almost any recipe that's recommended to you. I just wanted to share because I reeeeally like these recipes and I thought You Might Too.