Thursday, July 24, 2008

Bangs! Bangs! I'd Rather Be Dead!

Okay, maybe that title is a bit over dramatic, but only a bit. I think no one has ever wanted to grow their bangs out more than I do. And I've only had them since yesterday.

I've been excited to get new glasses and a haircut for months now, and finally the time has come. First I went to the Optyk to choose some frames. I was determined not to get thick, dark, rectangular frames like the rest of the world. I was going to be original; and look so cute doing it. Even with my hair straight and straggly and ugly, as I've been thinking it for some months now, I put on these frames and suddenly felt that I looked so hip and cute. My hair was actually just kind of layered and wild in a trendy sort of way. I tried on maybe 25 pairs and narrowed my choices down to three,( all of which were thick, dark, rectangular frames) and made an appointment for an eye exam.

Then I went to make an appointment to have my hair cut at the best fryzjer in Mielec. They found a way to squeeze me in before I went to my eye exam so that I could make my final decision on my frames with my new haircut. They promised I would be in and out by 3pm which was when I had my eye appointment across the street.

I find it very difficult not to fall asleep while having my hair cut. This is primarily because, with my glasses off, I can see approximately nothing. Not exactly nothing, because I was able to tell when the lady started cutting me some bangs. I've had hair stylist trying to convince me to let them cut bangs for years, and I alway say no way. Uh...this lady didn't ask, she just cut. I was a little surprised when I noticed it, and slightly bothered, but I settled into feeling glad, because I probably should have tried them out a long time ago, and plus, what if I looked amazing with them? Yes, I would probably look amazing with them.

She finished cutting and styling and I put my glasses back on. My first reaction on seeing my reflection in the mirror was to laugh. Then I smiled and got us out of there (I took Evie along as a consultant). I SO didn't like this haircut. THEN I looked at my watch and saw that it was almost 3:20. Can we say "satisfied customer?"

It was okay that we were late at the optician, and there were even about 30 seconds for me to mess with my hair in the mirror and decide that I REALLY didn't like this haircut. After the exam it was time to decide on frames. I put them all on in turn and guess what? Did they magically transform my hair into a fantastic and flattering cut? No. Every frame, when combined with my new cut, made me look like super-dork of the universe. I spent about 10 minutes deciding (nine of which were actually spent staring in disbelief at my hair) and found that I would be paying WAY more for these glasses, that only I sort of liked, than I wanted to. So when she asked if I wanted the skinnier kind of lenses for an extra $40 I said no, even though that means that you will probably see the thickness of the lenses sticking out of my frames. At this point, I really don't care, since I look like an dork anyway.

I will say that it's perfectly normal for me to come home from getting a haircut dissatisfied. Greg would be surprised if I ever came home and said that I liked my cut. I almost always come home, wash my hair for the third time that day and restyle it myself, and I usually feel better about the cut after that. No "just stepped out of a salon" feeling for me, thanks. I don't know if this is normal. Do other people do this? Well, either way, I do. But this time I didn't have the heart to try and fix it and then be disappointed again, so I left it until this morning. I just styled it myself, and: let's say I hated it 300% yesterday; I only hate it 250% when I style it myself. I'd rather go back to looking like Velma.

Also, when I came home yesterday Aaron laughed (actual, cute, baby, "mommy just made a funny joke" laughed) every single time he looked at me over the course of the first hour. I completely agree with him. This haircut is a joke.

*It's not a bad haircut. I'm sure she did a great job. It just is NOT my style and doesn't suit me.


sarah k. said...

This is exactly the reason I started cutting my own hair. Which is actually kind of difficult, with it being so short, but at least I don't have to fight with the stylist anymore.

I'm sure you look darling. Maybe you could do like I do every time my hair gets long enough to have bangs. Barretts.

Corina said...

Lisa, we all want to *SEE* this lovely cut for ourselves. where's the picture?

Nance said...

Yeah, where's the picture?

This is why I get my hair cut about once a year. But seriously, she just cut bangs?? Is that some sort of crazy European/Polish thing where they just do that?? Or just this specific hairdresser/beautician /stylist/barber?

Erin said...

That is so funny that Aaron was laughing at you. Lizzy was so mad at me when I cut my hair when she was that age. I recently had my haircut and it didn't look any different afterwards. I was pretty disappointed. I think that I just don't know how to explain what I want. Next time I will have to have some pictures. I third the need for a picture. I bet the dark rectangular glasses are great! I am glad you joined the crowd.

Susan said...

I'm dying to see the new hilarious you! Pictures! PICTURES!

Nathan said...

Wait, it will get worse. The frames will be lame too because, as you pointed out, you can see about nothing without your glasses on.

I hate that about haircuts and trying on new frames. And you had both squintillating experiences on the same day! Talk about reason for a major mid-afternoon headache! Frame shopping for people like us (those who wear glasses but not contacts) is usually a bit like this: "Yeah, that angular gray area in the middle of that skin tone area beneath my hair blob sure looks great! I mean, it must, seeing as those frames looked so sharp on the rack--WHEN I HAD MY GLASSES ON. . .

Lisa said...

OKAY, OKAY, I'll post a picture, after I get my glasses this weekend. You guys are all so rude. I know you just want to laugh and poke fun at me. This isn't an elementary school playground, you know!

Sarah- You know what? One of my main inspirations to get my haircut came when I started reading your blog and saw how incredibly good you look with a pixie cut. I decided that's what I want. And I think it's so cool that you cut it yourself.

Nance- Yeah, it was just this lady. I have to say, that at the beginning when we were talking about length, she asked if I wanted it about like hers, and I said yes. After she cut the bangs I looked at her hair and saw that SHE had bangs. Maybe therein lies the misunderstanding?

Nathan- Squintillating indeed! (1 point for new word) And that's exACTLY how frame shopping goes for me! (1 point for a laugh from your description) I have to practically have my nose touching the mirror to see how they look, and that's not all that good an indicator what they will look like to people who I don't happen to be kissing.

And & da boyz said...

I'm sure it's not as bad as you are saying, although you definitely get Justified Points for being upset about the spontaneous bangs--LAME. Remember when I tried to flip your hair? And you said it would look terrible and didn't want to do it, but let me anyway? Well, you hated it IMMEDIATELY, even before you saw it in the mirror, if you recall. But I didn't think it was that bad. But maybe not YOU. So anyway, maybe it's the same sitch--I agree with Sara--barrettes work wonders. Also, pre-barrettes = bobbypins. Cute hats. Headbands. And hair wax--a gem in its own right. :) Can't wait to see the new you!

April said...

I am so comforted to know that I was not the only miserable person yesterday. I cried for hours yesterday over my hair and never knew that so many foul words could actually exit my mouth in one day. I was frantic and balling and every neighbor heard me talking to my mother. One side of my hair is uneven and I have to wear it behind my ears. I have to look professional and I have to stand in front of a class. I almost quit my job yesterday. My class said it wasn't that bad. Great. I, too, wanted that salon feeling when I walked out.

Jill said...

My condolences.
I am currently dealing with a bad haircut. This is not a "she did a good job on the haircut, it's just not my style" but an actual, real bad haircut. At first I thought that it would be fine once I got home and was able to style it myself, but it's been three weeks, and it's still looking bad.
I don't understand why this cut went so bad. I've used this stylist before and I've always liked her haircuts, (except for the one she gave me that made me look like my crazy neighbor, but that wasn't her fault, she never met my neighbor)
I might just decide not to go out in public for three or four months. Come to think of it, if I do that, I won't have to shave my legs either.